爱情杀手：破坏爱情的15个坏习惯

Although some bad habits may seem minor, over time they can really add up and damage the relationship. Often, people underestimate how damaging these seemingly silly habits can be. If your guilty of any of these relationship habits, make changes to help nurture and grow your relationship instead of damaging it.

　　有些坏习惯虽然看起来微不足道，但它们却会随着时间的推移逐渐积聚，以致破坏感情。人们往往会低估这些愚蠢习惯的严重性。若你察觉了自身染上了这些恋爱病，那就作出改变，修塑内在，学会培养而非破坏感情。

　　1. Nagging Too Much

　　喋喋不休

　　Many studies have pointed to nagging as being the number one factor that makes men dissatisfied with their relationships. Don’t nag your partner. Remember that your partner doesn’t have to do things according to your timeline and nagging will only make the situation worse.

　　多项调查表明唠叨已成为男士不满恋情的头号因素。不要对你的伴侣喋喋不休。记住，对方没有义务按照你的行程表做事，一味地抱怨只会让事情变得更糟。

　　2. Not Taking Care of Yourself

　　不会照顾自己

　　You aren’t going to be a good partner unless you take care of yourself. The best partners are people who care for their emotional, physical, and spiritual health. Take care of yourself so you can give to your relationship.

　　只有照顾好了自己，才会成为理想情人。那些能照顾自己感情、身体以及精神的人，才是最佳爱人。唯独把自己照顾好了，你的感情才会得到呵护。

　　3. Taking Your Partner for Granted

　　视对方为理所当然

　　The longer you’ve been together the easier it can be to take your partner for granted. Take time to appreciate your partner every day so that you don’t overlook how fortunate you are.

　　两人在一起的时间越久，就越容易漠视对方的存在。要在每一天里去感激你的爱人，如此你才不会低估自己的幸运。

　　4. Half-Listening

　　敷衍了事

　　It can be easy to nod your head or say you agree to something without ever really hearing what your partner said. Half-listening to what your partner is one of those relationship habits that can lead to a lot of problems. Work on your communication so you can truly listen to what your partner has to say.

　　对方说话时，在没有真正倾听对方的情况下就点头或赞同当然容易。对伴侣所说的话漫不经心是引发一系列矛盾的原因之一。要认真交流，这样你才能真正收听到对方的讯号。

　　5. Avoiding Discussions About Problems

　　逃避探讨问题

　　Ignoring problems won’t make them disappear. In fact, many problems get worse when you don’t address them. Don’t avoid your relationship problems. Instead, be willing to tackle them in an adult manner.

　　漠视问题的存在不会解决问题。事实上，多数问题你若不去处理，事态反而会变得更糟。所以不要逃避，而应该用成年人的方式去处理。

　　6. Not Being Assertive

　　不够果敢

　　Pretending to agree with your partner when you aren’t really sure is one of those habits. It can lead to anger and resentment over time. Speak up and share your feelings in a respectful manner.

　　在你举棋不定时佯装赞同附和对方是恋爱通病之一。随着时间的累积，这将会引发不满和忿恨。用尊重彼此的方式大声说出你的心声，与对方分享你的情感吧。

　　7. Testing Your Partner’s Loyalty

　　测试对方的忠诚

　　Don’t test your partner’s loyalty. It will likely backfire over time. Instead, focus on your own loyalty toward your partner.

　　不要测试对方的忠诚。时间久了只会适得其反。取而代之的是你得注意一下自己的忠贞。

　　8. Complaining About Your Partner

　　抱怨对方

　　Don’t call your mother or your best friend to complain about your partner. If you are upset or don’t like your partner’s behavior, talk to your partner directly.

　　不要邀上你的妈妈或闺蜜一起抱怨你的伴侣。如果你不满或不喜欢对方的表现，那就直接告诉对方

　　9. Not Balancing Friend and Family Time

　　不会平衡与亲友相处的时间

　　Spending time with friends and family is part of being a well-balanced person. However, if you spend too much time with others, you could neglect your relationship. Strive to find just the right balance and it will help keep your relationship fresh and exciting.

　　花时间陪伴好友和家人是懂得时间平衡之人的一部分。但是，如果你在这方面花去了大部分时间，那你的感情就会遭到冷遇。所以要努力寻找适宜的平衡点，这样你们的恋情才会新鲜刺激。

　　10. Using the Silent Treatment

　　沉默对待

　　The silent treatment is a passive-aggressive tactic that can harm your relationship. It is often about control and not about trying to calm down. Learn how to address your issues in a more productive manner

　　沉默是伤感情的消极攻击策略。这往往是想要控制对方而非尝试去平静心态的表现。所以要以更加有效的方式去处理你的情感纠纷。

　　11. Taking Teasing Too Far

　　过分戏谑

　　Although a little teasing can lead to a good laugh, taking teasing too far can damage the relationship. Don’t embarrass your partner in front of others or continue to tease when your partner asks you to stop

　　偶尔的调侃能制造欢乐，但若越界却只会破坏感情。不要让你的伴侣在众人面前出丑，也不要在对方叫停时仍然不知趣地继续戏谑。

　　12. Telling “White Lies”

　　撒“善意的”谎言

　　One of the worst relationship habits is lying. Even those little white lies can seriously damage your relationship. Whether you aren’t honest about how much you spent on a shopping trip or where you went last, it can destroy the relationship.

　　撒谎是恋爱时最糟糕的习惯。即使是不起眼的善意谎言也会严重影响你们的感情。无论你谎报购物花销还是先前去向，这都会伤害感情。

　　13. Focusing on Your Happiness Only

　　只在乎自己的快乐

　　Too often, people focus on what they’re gaining from the relationship rather than focusing on what they’re giving. Whether you’re happy or not, put effort into making your partner happy.

　　通常，人们只在乎自己从恋爱中得到了什么而非付出了哪些。无论你快乐与否，你都要尽力让你的爱人开心。

　　14. Keeping Score

　　斤斤计较

　　Don’t keep score about who earned what or whose turn it is next. Instead, focus on working together as a team to do what’s best for the relationship.

　　不要计较得失，也不要在意下回是谁的主。相反，你们要合二为一全心去相互协作，为这份感情做最好的努力。

　　15. Making a Scene in Public

　　公共场合大吵大闹

　　Throwing a fit at a restaurant, yelling on the sidewalk, or exhibiting the silent treatment at a friend’s party can all be very damaging to the relationship. Avoid making a scene in public. Instead, keep your private business just between the two of you.

　　无论是在餐厅里发脾气，人行道上怒吼还是在友人派对上上演哑剧，这都会严重影响到你们的感情。要避免在公共场合大吵大闹。所以，把私人问题拿回家里关门处理。